FIRST OF ALL, IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE? I GO OVER THINGS SO MUCH IN MY HEAD AND SOMETIMES THINGS JUST DON'T MAKE SENSE WHEN I REALLY NEED THEM TO. LIKE - HOW DO YOU MAINTAIN YOUR CALM IN A SITUATION THAT IS NEVER GOING TO BE? OR - HOW CAN YOU BRING THE TEMPERATURE DOWN WITH PEOPLE THAT MAKE YOUR BLOOD BOIL? SOMETIMES YOU CAN'T.
I AM BY NO MEANS PERFECT SO LET'S JUST GET THAT OUT OF THE WAY.....
WHAT I DO KNOW IS THAT I LEARN THINGS THE HARD WAY - BUT - I ALSO KNOW THAT I HAVE THE CAPABILITY TO BE THE CALM IN A CRAZY SITUATION. TRUST ME, I USED TO WORK IN PROPERTY MANAGEMENT WHERE YOU LIVE ON SITE AMONG THE PEOPLE YOU HAVE TO ENFORCE RULES AND REGULATIONS WITH. YOU HAVE TO JUST SAY "OK" AND JUST LISTEN WHEN YOU ARE REALLY ABOUT TO EXPLODE. THERE WERE COUNTLESS TIMES I HAD PEOPLE SCREAMING AT ME ABOUT MY BOSS, A LETTER THEY RECEIVED, OR PETTY PROBLEMS WITH THEIR NEIGHBORS. IN THOSE SITUATIONS I CAN HONESTLY SAY I NEVER ONCE LOST MY COOL AND JUST TRIED DIFUSING THE SITUATION. AFTER YEARS OF DOING THIS LINE OF WORK IT REALLY DOES TAKE ITS EMOTIONAL TOLL ON YOU. WE ARE LIKE A LAMB BEING SACRIFICED AND IT'S YOUR JOB.....
ALL THESE YEARS THAT I HAVE BEEN INVOLVED WITH WORK, SCHOOL, FAMILY, PARENTING, ETC. AND YOU ARE ON A CONTIUNOUS CYCLE OF LEARNING HOW TO DEAL AND JUST AS QUICKLY AS YOU RESOLVE ONE SITUATION ANOTHER ONE IS WAITING RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER.
THERE ARE SOME STRATEGIES THAT WORK AND IT DEPENDS ON YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE. I AM NOT A PERSON WHO LIKES TO TAKE THE MEDICATION ROUTE. I'M A PERSON WHO LIKES TO BE CLEAR HEADED AND MY TRUE SELF. TO SHOW VULNERABILITY AT TIMES MAY BE EXACTLY WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES CALL FOR. BEING WHO YOU REALLY ARE AND COPING THE BEST WAY YOU KNOW HOW WITHOUT A HUGE CONFRONTATION IS ALWAYS THE BEST WAY TO GO. PERSONALLY I DETEST VIOLENCE AND ALL THAT IT BRINGS TO THE TABLE. NOTHING GOOD CAN EVER COME OUT OF IT. WORDS ARE POWERFUL IF YOU KNOW HOW TO USE THEM CORRECTLY. IT'S IMPORTANT TO SHOW YOUR STRENGTH IN A WAY THAT SHOWS YOU ARE EMPATHETIC BUT ALSO MORE THAN CAPABLE OF HANDLING THINGS THE RIGHT WAY. I REALIZE THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT CAPABLE OF BEING CALM EVER!
RECENTLY I WAS IN A SITUATION THAT I REALLY DID NOT WANT ANY PART OF. IT HAD TO DO WITH A PERSON I WORK DAILY TO AVOID. I WANT NOTHING OF THIS PERSON AND WANT NOTHING OF THEM IN MY LIFE. IT'S NOT A MATTER OF BAD MOUTHING THEM BUT IT IS COMPLETELY UNHEALTHY AND FOR THE SANITY AND SAFETY OF BOTH MYSELF AND MY CHILD I HAVE KEPT MY DISTANCE AND JUST STAY OUT OF THINGS INVOLVING THIS PERSON. I WAS BROUGHT TO A POINT OF NO RETURN WHEN I WAS CALLED BY THIS PERSON AND I AM NOT PROUD IN SAYING THAT I COMPLETELY LOST MYSELF IN IT. SO MUCH HAD BUILT UP AND ONCE IT STARTED FLOWING I COULDN'T STOP. I ENDED UP ABSOLUTELY FEELING OUT OF MY MIND AND I WAS SO MAD AT MYSELF THAT I LET IT GET TO ME THE WAY IT DID. I KNOW BETTER BUT I WAS CAUGHT COMPLETELY OFF GUARD - NOT THAT I AM JUSTIFIED IN MY ACTIONS BUT IT'S THE TRUTH.
LOOKING BACK - I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD HAVE DONE IT ANY DIFFERENT. THE ENTIRETY OF THE SITUATION WAS SO OUT OF CONTROL FROM THE START THAT IT SET THE STAGE FOR THE COMPLETE UNRAVEL OF THE PROBLEM. JUST FOR INFORMATION SAKE, THE PROBLEM NEVER DID GET RESOLVED. IT ALWAYS ENDS UP THAT WAY AND THAT IS WHY I WAS SO UPSET WITH MYSELF. I'M PRETTY GOOD AT HOLDING MY OWN IN THE RIGHT WAY. IT'S IMPORTANT TO LEAD BY EXAMPLE AND I WAS NO EXAMPLE THAT NIGHT. BUT, YOU LIVE AND YOU LEARN AND THAT IS ALL YOU CAN DO. I NEVER SET OUT TO HURT ANYONE BUT WHEN I FEEL A DEEP SENSE OF DESPIRATION OR PROTECTION I FIGHT FOR WHAT I KNOW I NEED TO. THE MESSAGE WAS RIGHT BUT HOW IT WAS PRESENTED WAS NOT. FOR THAT I DO REGRET BUT I MEANT THE OVERALL MESSAGE AND STAND BY IT.
I WOULD HAVE TO SAY THAT BEING ABLE TO KEEP YOUR COOL UNDER VERY TRYING CIRCUMSTANCES IS A TASK THAT CAN BE EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO NAVIGATE THROUGH AND WHEN EMOTION TAKES OVER YOU NEVER KNOW HOW YOU MAY RESPOND. THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT ONE POSITIVE THING CAME OF IT AND THAT IS TO ALWAYS BE HONEST WITH WHAT YOU ARE SAYING BUT TO ALWAYS REMEMBER: THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK. TAKE A WALK, DO SOME YOGA, MAYBE EVEN SOME MEDITATION.....BUT NEVER ALLOW ANYONE OR ANYTHING COMPROMISE WHO YOU ARE AND MAKE YOU ACT OUT IN A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT REFLECT YOUR TRUE CHARACTER. IN THE END YOU ONLY FEEL DISAPPOINTED WITH YOURSELF AND IT MAKES THE CRAZY PERSON LOOK NEARLY SANE.....NEARLY. JUST LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES. WE ARE HUMAN AND SOMETIMES WE NEED TO BE REMINDED THAT ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE AT ANY GIVEN TIME WITHOUT ANY WARNING....
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